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"My difference? A strength!" - Vanessa gives her testimony on disability 🎙️

Vanessa témoigne sur le handicap
19 November, 2021

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Transcript of the interview

Fanny: The recording is on. So, can you start by simply introducing yourself?

Vanessa : So yes, exactly, my name is Vanessa Fernandes, I am 38 years old. My professional background is mainly commercial. It's what I've always liked to do.

Fanny: Okay, so you've always done this?

Vanessa : Ah exactly, but before that I was really in the shops. I started out working in interior design shops: BHV, Castorama, until I had an accident that put me in a wheelchair for 8 months...

Fanny: Okay...

Vanessa : So I had 8 months in a wheelchair and then a year and a half of re-education to learn to walk again, to get new bearings. Because when you're in a wheelchair too, it's a big shock, especially when you're a very active person. I was really in the decoration department, so I was moving around, I was at the cash desk from morning to night, I was pulling the pallets...

When from one day to the next you find yourself without legs, it's very complicated. So there is a great deal of soul-searching to be done and, above all, you have to keep... How would you put it? Keep a certain energy, a certain positivity...

I know that I made a lot of progress by doing a lot of work on myself and that's what allowed me to bounce back. And because after my accident, when I had to find work again, well I said to myself "It's not serious, I'll do telephone sales because my legs are not so good, because I need to work, because for me work is health.

So I went with my wheelchair and then my crutches. I worked. I sold rolls of toilet paper by telephone, that's it, to sell them to an ESAT.... That's really... In any case, the only thing I know how to do is trade, so I jumped right back into it.

After that, years went by, so I was still in a lot of pain, but I continued on my way. I went back to much smaller shops.

Fanny: Okay...

Vanessa : So, that's it, so my decorative side and pushing the pallets and all, I knew that it was finished anyway. You shouldn't fool yourself...The after-effects that I keep today can't...It's not compatible! It's not compatible! So we questioned ourselves and asked ourselves "What would you like to do in a small shop? Well, telephony? Why not? I went into it with the same thing, a suitable job and everything went very well. After five years, I was appointed shop manager.

Fanny: Ahhh, great!

Vanessa : So here it is, they wanted me to continue: they told me "Ok Vanessa, this shop is for you and I only see you here. You're going to take over the management". Well, I had a blast! Afterwards, I was going round in circles... I'm someone who likes challenges a lot !

Fanny: Yes, you can feel it!

Vanessa : I think I got to the top and I thought, "Well, what else are we going to do...? I was starting to go round in circles a bit. Let's go on an adventure! I didn't want to work at home anymore. I really wanted to have a job, that's it... The job, I don't take it home, I do my hours and that's it. And then I saw that in this field, disability is not very well perceived. Not necessarily by the employers, but by the colleagues.

Fanny: Is it true? The colleagues...?

Vanessa : Oh yeah! Colleges, because when you're in a team where even the boss... Yes, I remember well, even the boss said to me: "Well, in the end, I'm not going to take you on in my department because I've got older people who won't accept that you don't do housework like them.

I said "Yes, but I have a disability, I can't bend down, I can't go under the machines, so this is discrimination in fact, what you are doing".

So the manager immediately backed off. She said, "No, it's okay, I'll keep you. I had to make a little comment: "No, I don't want to hear that". And I told him, face to face, "I don't want to hear that, to say that it's because the old ones won't accept it. I can't do that, I can't do that. Because it's not a choice for me, it's not a whim. It's that I CAN'T do it!

After that, I joined a company, same thing... Every time I join a company, I'm frank and I say straight away: "There, I have disabled worker status for such and such a reason". "Ah, well, okay...". A month later, the company said to me: "But I didn't know! But I didn't know! What kind of medicine are you taking? Because you understand, I can't employ someone who takes drugs! And then I said: "What? But you knew about it from the interview. You did the interview, so you know about my situation".

Afterwards, I didn't fight because the values of this person didn't correspond to me. I need a company to support me. Yes, because it's like a marriage somewhere, you don't sign documents with just anyone and I need a relationship of trust and a relationship where I already feel listened to.

And at SIG, it's...But wow! The chief's surprise, really! When I applied on Saturday and on Monday HR called me and I said, with a lot of nerve: "I was expecting your call". It's important to clarify all this... Yes, it was a very, very nice story! ...And I knew since Saturday that I was going to be called. There are things like that which cannot be explained...

Fanny: You felt it, you felt it.

Vanessa : Ah, but I totally felt it. And when she called me, I didn't tell her over the phone. I mean, she had seen my CV but we didn't come to talk about it, about the disability. I said to myself, "I'll do it when I'm in Paris".

Fanny: Yes, I agree

Vanessa: Because two years ago, a company like SIG let me come to Paris. We had done 3 Skype interviews which went very well. Normally, I went up for the job, right. And when I arrived and at the end of the interview, I simply asked what kind of car do you have? They looked at me sideways and said:

"Why?"

"No, I just want to know if it's a manual or an automatic"?

"And why?"

"Because I have a disability and an automatic gearbox would be more comfortable for me.

I didn't even say "compulsory", I said "nice", because I was so keen on this job. And they called me back an hour later to tell me that finally, "Sorry, but no".

So that really chilled me, enormously.

That's why at SIG I didn't take it out right away. But when I read on LinkedIn, on Facebook, the little weekly papers that you do (it's very nice): this company is great! I feel at ease, I can talk about it and on the first day of the training, when we all discussed the subject of the vehicle, when it came up, I took the liberty of talking about it to my future manager who said to me "But of course, yes Vanessa, right away. I'll discuss it with the HR department straight away. There's no problem. And two weeks later, I had a suitable vehicle.

Fanny: Okay, so it was set up very, very quickly.

Vanessa : Ah, but very quickly. I went up to Paris a fortnight later to bring the vehicle and leave with a new one. New, completely new.

Ah, that's really... There you go... I don't know what else to say, except really. You shouldn't hide because keeping it inside is not good, it's not good.
It can... You can end up in depression. There was a period when I obviously went through depression. You mustn't close yourself off.

There are people who are there for us, to listen to us, to understand and to adapt. In the end, it's just a question of adaptability. It's not complicated. We are not machines, nor robots. We are humans...

Fanny: Exactly...

Vanessa : With everyone...That's it... I compensate for my handicap with my joy of living, I try...

So I'm not saying that every day is easy, of course, that my daily life doesn't necessarily resemble the daily life of an average person. I'll be careful not to go to bed late, because I need to rest my legs. I know that I can't walk much either, so I'm going to pay attention to where I park, how I do things, how I manage my days... That's it.

But once you know your disability and you actually adapt, you shouldn't go against yourself.

For a long time I tried to be a fighter. But no...I would come home in pain, I was all broken, I had to call my physio to take me in urgently.

Yes, it's no use. As soon as we have someone in front of us who knows about our problem...Well, not even a problem...Our difference, we'll say...For me it's a difference. And fortunately, because that's it. Now, it has become a strength, that's all.

Fanny: you can feel it

Vanessa : I've got even more character let's say

Fanny: But you can feel it. You can feel that you are a person who is full of motivation, who is full of dynamism and that is great, that is really great.

Vanessa : That's life. Life brings us through strange times. But we mustn't forget that we only have one life, that we are only passing through. We will always have worse than us, we mustn't forget that either. There's always worse than us, we mustn't feel sorry for ourselves and say "Oh, my god, what am I going to do...". No, well, we continue in this, in a different way, but continue in the contact and here I am, I am boosting myself. So I also spend a lot of time trying to do philosophy. I try to...

In fact, I'm thirsty to learn. And that's it. It's actually a mind. It's really a mind.

Fanny: Yes, I think that a mindset is everything. I just have one small question: at the moment, with your team, how are things going? Because just now, you mentioned the fact that in companies, before coming to SIG, things didn't necessarily go well. Today, have you spoken to your team about it, are they aware of your disability?

Vanessa : Yeah, totally. Likewise, I feel really supported. When I went up to Paris, we met up with a colleague who had taken the same train as me, so to get to the Vélizy offices, we made the journey together. He was immediately very attentive, he saw me struggling, walking up and down, "Wait, I'll take your bag". No, no really. It's perfect. There were no words too many, no dirty little jokes. I'm dealing with responsible people. We're not in the same league as I've been in before.

Fanny: Well, good, good. I'm glad it's happening like this, clearly.

Vanessa : Aaaah yeah!

Fanny:Do you want to add anything, because I think... I think we have everything!

Vanessa : Is this true?

Fanny: Well yeah, wait! Hey!

Vanessa :  I put pressure on myself...

Fanny: But pressure for nothing, ma'am! It all came out, it was natural and that's what we wanted. But... do you want to say one more word?

Vanessa : Not to hesitate to show who you are. To go towards people. In particular, to go to the HRDs because you can't hide. You have to exchange. You have to exchange because it's very important and that's how you make progress.

Fanny: Perfect!

Vanessa : But here's what I'd like to say at the end, to really encourage people who have little health problems like that and who don't dare... I'd like them to take the bottle off a little... Here.

Fanny: Yes, that they are not afraid to talk about it and that they feel comfortable enough to do so. And above all, we are there to accompany them.

Vanessa : Exactly!

Fanny: Well, we're good

Vanessa : Well, that's great!

A big THANK YOU to Vanessa for this positive and open hearted testimony!
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